Sales conferences can cajole unpredictable creativity. Here are my haiku notes:
"Do the math", speakers say
Symbols clash
The gong of predictability
--
Droning on forever, the speakers
Talk while I suppress
A yawn
--
Phone; it buzzes in my pocket
Bringing messages from far
I ignore it
--
Bringing stories of valour
The speakers come;
I vote
--
Around the round table
I sit quietly
Making poems
--
Sitting around a round table
I listen to the presenters
Time froze
--
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humor. Show all posts
Many Me's
Personality is usually defined as a relatively enduring set of traits that make an individual unique and produces consistencies in thoughts and behavior. It is, by definition, a static concept. Once a person is known to have A personality, he is expected to show behavior consistent with that personality.
Needless to say, the fact that I am copying a Google definition in my opening paragraph means that I am going to refute it. How predictable, isn't it! ;-)
I think I have the potential to have multiple personalities. No, this isn't an invitation to sign me up for a 10-session-trial-program with a shrink. What I mean to say is that I can display consistent patterns of behavior under different conditions, such that the behavior is inconsistent with my own behavior under other circumstances. Heavy stuff, eh! Let me tell you more...I think all of us have the potential to have multiple stable personalities. Take that to the bank!
Allow me to clarify- Condition 1...sunny California. Condition 2...angry, hot Delhi. Imagine yourself driving down the freeway (or Ring Road, in Delhi), and this jerk in the white SUV cuts into your lane in the front. Under condition 1, I slow down my car, smile at the nice guy in front of me, and think about how the guy is probably in a hurry and needs to get ahead. Under condition 2, the Delhi sun is beating down the roof of the car, the car's puny airconditioning is barely able to keep up, and I am already bristling with anger at the slow pace of the traffic. Now, when this guy cuts ahead, I begin foaming with rage, my forehead prickles with sweat, choice vernacular "colored language" climbs up to the tip of my tongue, and I begin to honk at the insolence of this #$%. I am ready to drive over this guy now.
Same stimulus, different conditions...completely different response. Bay area guy, please meet Delhi guy.
So, in my book, a personality is a SET of consistent behaviors that are stable over time, and may not be at-all consistent with each other.
This is great news, Really! What that means is that if I am able to (1) identify my various personalities, and (2) control which state I am in right now, I will be able to do things far beyond what I do currently.
It's called method acting. Actors do this all the time - they channel completely different personalities by not faking it, but by really feeling the emotions that their characters are going through.
Politicians use this all the time. One time they will channel a benign, charming, baby-kissing personality. Another moment, they will unleash the fires of hell. Check out this photo of a Soviet premier banging his shoe on the UN table. Is that angry, or what?
So what are my stable personality types- let me count the ways. There's the kind and gentle me, the foaming-mad-Delhi-me, the brilliant-ideator-me, the-timid-mouse-me, the-teamplayer-me, the-world-citizen-me, the witty-silent-killer-me, the-kindly-friendly-smiley-me, the-yogi-gyani-me, the-lonely-depressive-me, and the-confused-jetlagged-me. Then there's the Mii I created on my Wii-game-console, but that's not even real!
Be aware, be very aware. I'm now going to be aware of who's playing me at any moment, and why I'm in that particular personality at the moment.
Watch and Think. Then I'm going to see which me would perform best in a given environment/situation. Going to Delhi, but don't want to be mad? Call the "kind and gentle" me. Going to a business meeting, and want to hold the upper hand in the negotiations? Avoid the "timid-mouse" me, and instead invoke the "witty-silent-killer" me.
Switch. Then I'm going to see if I can - through will power - command a different me to take over on demand. Just like snap.
Snap!
Hello there!
Needless to say, the fact that I am copying a Google definition in my opening paragraph means that I am going to refute it. How predictable, isn't it! ;-)
I think I have the potential to have multiple personalities. No, this isn't an invitation to sign me up for a 10-session-trial-program with a shrink. What I mean to say is that I can display consistent patterns of behavior under different conditions, such that the behavior is inconsistent with my own behavior under other circumstances. Heavy stuff, eh! Let me tell you more...I think all of us have the potential to have multiple stable personalities. Take that to the bank!
Allow me to clarify- Condition 1...sunny California. Condition 2...angry, hot Delhi. Imagine yourself driving down the freeway (or Ring Road, in Delhi), and this jerk in the white SUV cuts into your lane in the front. Under condition 1, I slow down my car, smile at the nice guy in front of me, and think about how the guy is probably in a hurry and needs to get ahead. Under condition 2, the Delhi sun is beating down the roof of the car, the car's puny airconditioning is barely able to keep up, and I am already bristling with anger at the slow pace of the traffic. Now, when this guy cuts ahead, I begin foaming with rage, my forehead prickles with sweat, choice vernacular "colored language" climbs up to the tip of my tongue, and I begin to honk at the insolence of this #$%. I am ready to drive over this guy now.
Same stimulus, different conditions...completely different response. Bay area guy, please meet Delhi guy.
So, in my book, a personality is a SET of consistent behaviors that are stable over time, and may not be at-all consistent with each other.
This is great news, Really! What that means is that if I am able to (1) identify my various personalities, and (2) control which state I am in right now, I will be able to do things far beyond what I do currently.
It's called method acting. Actors do this all the time - they channel completely different personalities by not faking it, but by really feeling the emotions that their characters are going through.
Politicians use this all the time. One time they will channel a benign, charming, baby-kissing personality. Another moment, they will unleash the fires of hell. Check out this photo of a Soviet premier banging his shoe on the UN table. Is that angry, or what?
So what are my stable personality types- let me count the ways. There's the kind and gentle me, the foaming-mad-Delhi-me, the brilliant-ideator-me, the-timid-mouse-me, the-teamplayer-me, the-world-citizen-me, the witty-silent-killer-me, the-kindly-friendly-smiley-me, the-yogi-gyani-me, the-lonely-depressive-me, and the-confused-jetlagged-me. Then there's the Mii I created on my Wii-game-console, but that's not even real!
Be aware, be very aware. I'm now going to be aware of who's playing me at any moment, and why I'm in that particular personality at the moment.
Watch and Think. Then I'm going to see which me would perform best in a given environment/situation. Going to Delhi, but don't want to be mad? Call the "kind and gentle" me. Going to a business meeting, and want to hold the upper hand in the negotiations? Avoid the "timid-mouse" me, and instead invoke the "witty-silent-killer" me.
Switch. Then I'm going to see if I can - through will power - command a different me to take over on demand. Just like snap.
Snap!
Hello there!
The 2am email itch
Today morning, I was pleasantly surprised to read about the 2am blackberry itch on the Wall Street Journal's article about "BlackBerry Orphans". I had written about this earlier when I wrote about the midnight bulb.
The article talks about how the Blackberry is altering parenting dynamics in the modern world. It's true - the world is not the same anymore. (1) Baby Talk: My 2.5 year daughter can say "Backberi" and "bootuth", and I bet your kids can do likewise. (2) Father-Son teaching: My son beats me at brickbreaker by several levels. (3) Father-Son bonding: I've been at my son's basketball game, checking to see if there are urgent emails that deserve my attention right that instant. (4) Restroom breaks: And, of course, I sneak a peek into the blackberry during the 2am trip to the restroom. (Helpful tip - shake my hand, but don't ask to see my blackberry! ;-) ).
It's not me, its my monkey...There are a couple of interesting blogs to read if you're a fellow addict. Fellow blogger Itzy Sabo talks about managing emails, and life. Another cool blog, called Mind Hacks, talks about the addictive nature of email here and says that email is addictive because its a variable-interval reinforcement schedule. Didn't understand it? ;-) It just means that our monkey brains are wired to repeat an activity if there is a reward (banana, peanut) that does not come in a predictable frequency.
Breaking the Fix. Now that we have someone to blame for our blackberry/email addiction, we can get around to doing something about it. Flushing the Blackberry is one such idea mentioned in the WSJ, apart from a good 12-step-path-to-rehab. The Mindhacks blog mentions another set of things to try out.
Try yoga instead. I've noticed that I never get interesting emails when I'm doing the downward dog. In fact, I can officially certify that I don't get interesting emails anytime I'm doing yoga.
Hmmm...this could be contagious! Coming to think of it, I don't receive any interesting emails anytime between 5-9am, 9am-9pm, and between 9pm and 2am. It's only during the 2am visit that I get anything worth reading! That too, occasionally.
The article talks about how the Blackberry is altering parenting dynamics in the modern world. It's true - the world is not the same anymore. (1) Baby Talk: My 2.5 year daughter can say "Backberi" and "bootuth", and I bet your kids can do likewise. (2) Father-Son teaching: My son beats me at brickbreaker by several levels. (3) Father-Son bonding: I've been at my son's basketball game, checking to see if there are urgent emails that deserve my attention right that instant. (4) Restroom breaks: And, of course, I sneak a peek into the blackberry during the 2am trip to the restroom. (Helpful tip - shake my hand, but don't ask to see my blackberry! ;-) ).
It's not me, its my monkey...There are a couple of interesting blogs to read if you're a fellow addict. Fellow blogger Itzy Sabo talks about managing emails, and life. Another cool blog, called Mind Hacks, talks about the addictive nature of email here and says that email is addictive because its a variable-interval reinforcement schedule. Didn't understand it? ;-) It just means that our monkey brains are wired to repeat an activity if there is a reward (banana, peanut) that does not come in a predictable frequency.
Breaking the Fix. Now that we have someone to blame for our blackberry/email addiction, we can get around to doing something about it. Flushing the Blackberry is one such idea mentioned in the WSJ, apart from a good 12-step-path-to-rehab. The Mindhacks blog mentions another set of things to try out.
Try yoga instead. I've noticed that I never get interesting emails when I'm doing the downward dog. In fact, I can officially certify that I don't get interesting emails anytime I'm doing yoga.
Hmmm...this could be contagious! Coming to think of it, I don't receive any interesting emails anytime between 5-9am, 9am-9pm, and between 9pm and 2am. It's only during the 2am visit that I get anything worth reading! That too, occasionally.
The midnight bulb...
A close friend recently wrote about the perils of globe-trotting. (Read Basab's post here). To summarize, globetrotting creates jet-lag, which lowers your life-span. That set me thinking about the other problem with hard-working tech companies in the flat world - the midnight bulb.
I'm not referring here to the blackberry indicator LED, which should be called the "2am light" given that most crackberry addicts usually sneak a peek into the bbry at the 2am loo trip. Nope, not that kind of light.
I'm referring instead to the old phrase about burning the midnight oil. Given that people working in global companies need more light than 1 lumen, a more contemporary phrase would be "lighting the midnight bulb".
Flat-world companies light the midnight bulb more. Take me, for instance. I started yesterday with a 5am conference call, and then had calls and meetings until - umm- about 5pm. Then, I got enough time to get back home, change back into my PJs, and then get on a 6pm call that went on till 11pm. Fortunately, on the phone, no one knows you smell like a dog!
My tech firm isn't quite the evil, soul-stripping enterprise. No Sir! Well, at least it isn't alone in this 24hr culture. There's a recent HBR article about the "dangerous allure of the 70-hour workweek". (HBR article abstract here). Everyone's doing it.
Flat-world companies do this out of necessity. If you wait for people to interact with their global colleagues over email, you can forget about closing any discussion anytime this year. The flatter the company hierarchy, the higher the need for more people to know what's going on. People can't know what's going on unless someone tells them. No one can tell a person anything unless its real-time. Welcome to the world of 24x7 flexitime enterprise!
Yeah, I'm to blame too. Well, I could have said NO to the 5am call. But I didn't. Why? Well, if I don't get on that call, I'd have to fly across the world (to headquarters, none less), and meet the same folks to get the same work done. If I have to reduce my lifespan, I'd rather do that in my pajamas at home.
Fighting back is not easy. I try to fight back in my own way. If I do have to take call on silent mode at 5am, you can bet your bottom dollar that I'm doing yoga while the phone's on speakerphone and mute. Heh! If its a 9pm call, you can be sure I'm editing my blog on the side.
I'm not listening, OK!? It's called continuous partial attention and, by God! I have it!
I'm not referring here to the blackberry indicator LED, which should be called the "2am light" given that most crackberry addicts usually sneak a peek into the bbry at the 2am loo trip. Nope, not that kind of light.
I'm referring instead to the old phrase about burning the midnight oil. Given that people working in global companies need more light than 1 lumen, a more contemporary phrase would be "lighting the midnight bulb".
Flat-world companies light the midnight bulb more. Take me, for instance. I started yesterday with a 5am conference call, and then had calls and meetings until - umm- about 5pm. Then, I got enough time to get back home, change back into my PJs, and then get on a 6pm call that went on till 11pm. Fortunately, on the phone, no one knows you smell like a dog!
My tech firm isn't quite the evil, soul-stripping enterprise. No Sir! Well, at least it isn't alone in this 24hr culture. There's a recent HBR article about the "dangerous allure of the 70-hour workweek". (HBR article abstract here). Everyone's doing it.
Flat-world companies do this out of necessity. If you wait for people to interact with their global colleagues over email, you can forget about closing any discussion anytime this year. The flatter the company hierarchy, the higher the need for more people to know what's going on. People can't know what's going on unless someone tells them. No one can tell a person anything unless its real-time. Welcome to the world of 24x7 flexitime enterprise!
Yeah, I'm to blame too. Well, I could have said NO to the 5am call. But I didn't. Why? Well, if I don't get on that call, I'd have to fly across the world (to headquarters, none less), and meet the same folks to get the same work done. If I have to reduce my lifespan, I'd rather do that in my pajamas at home.
Fighting back is not easy. I try to fight back in my own way. If I do have to take call on silent mode at 5am, you can bet your bottom dollar that I'm doing yoga while the phone's on speakerphone and mute. Heh! If its a 9pm call, you can be sure I'm editing my blog on the side.
I'm not listening, OK!? It's called continuous partial attention and, by God! I have it!
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